Let's just say that I took a look at where I was and decided that I needed to change. I decided that awhile ago, and I kept telling myself that I was going to change. I would have little moments where I was like "yeah, i'll do that. Tomorrow." I said tomorrow for months. I thought that since I was telling myself that I would change that I was good. I didn't need to do anything.
But I was just so unhappy. Every little challenge I found myself facing was the worst thing in the world. I found myself complaining more often. Focusing solely on the negative. It is very easy to say that I was extremely unhappy. And for some reason I could not figure out why.
One day someone at work asked me how I was doing. He could tell that I wasn't myself. So I just kind of told him everything that was on my mind. The different things that I'm going through. He being the great friend that he is, challenged me to do something that really changed my attitude. He told me to go home and find a place where I can be completely alone and able to feel the spirit with out any disruptions and to read my patriarchal blessing. But while reading it he told me to write down every single blessing that I am promised. When he told me to do that I was so skeptical. But before I finished the first paragraph I was overcome with the spirit. It was the feeling of peace that I hadn't felt for the longest time. That feeling was specifically what I needed to get me to change. It was a feeling of assurance that the Lord is there, but also that I need to do my part to be the best I can be.
Since doing that, there was a big attitude change. It motivated me to change even more to become the best I can be. I started texting another friend who I trust completely and just ask her for advice. She told me that it is hard to change everything at once. It's impossible. But you can make goals each day to work on one thing. But to make it even more meaningful, make a daily covenant with God. Promise Him that you will work on one thing that day.
That made such an incredible difference. It still is making the biggest difference in my life. God is there to help us. When I said a prayer to Him on that first day asking Him to help me have a positive attitude that day, and that I was promising to be as happy as possible, He did help me.
I am at the point where I am still making these covenants with God. I am still struggling with some bad habits, and i'm working on forming new habits, but God is there with me. And I have been blessed with a crazy amount of happiness and peace. Even though I am going through challenges, and I have more that enough things that stress me out, I am happy. And that is because I take the time to keep God a big part of my life. I am constantly relying on Him for everything. He is always in my mind, and that is why I am happy.
